...Bump...

Well, these past few days and weeks we have been going non-stop working with the church and trying to enjoy the beautiful weather, getting things done outside around the house. As we were going about our crazy life we didn't think about the fact that I was "late". When I sat down and started thinking about it I realized that there was a possibility I was roughly 7weeks pregnant. Of course this wasn't part of our plan so to speak. We figured J would closer to 2 before we started trying, and we just kept praying that our plans and God's plans for our lives lined up. I had taken two pregnancy tests that showed up negative so I was giving up on taking another one for now. I knew that when I was pregnant with J for the first seven weeks I tested negative with the at home tests and that could be happening again. I knew that we were pregnant though because I was feeling somewhat the same way I did when I was pregnant the first time. We didn't say anything to anyone because we wanted to make sure that we were 100% sure before we shared the good news!
This past weekend was a very busy weekend. B and I did get a date night on Friday and then I worked on a cake later that night for Saturday. The next morning we woke up early and went yard saling (I know it is so old person-like, but we love that time together doing nothing!). When we got home we had to rush like crazy for B to get to the church to work and for me to get on the road to deliver the cake and get to a bridal shower. Friday night I started have these light pains and thought nothing of it, I just kept going like I always do. Saturday I started to notice some more pains and "spotting". I knew this wasn't normal. I tried not to think about it too much. But as the day went on the pains were stronger and the spotting turned to excessive bleeding and I started to pass blood clots. I knew this was really bad, but still didn't want to think about it. Sunday afternoon after small groups one of the families asked how I was feeling (since we had talked to them about what was going on before) and he confirmed my thoughts...it was a miscarriage. I trust this person since they are a doctor. When we left there we just kept going non-stop until about 9:30ish when it finally hit we lost a baby. I couldn't help but to be in tears over this. It has been a very hard couple of days. I know that God has a reason for everything he does, but it doesn't make it any easier at this moment.
Yesterday was probably one of the hardest days so far. B was gone to Holiday World with the youth and J and I stayed home. I kept feeling the whole day like it was just a bad dream, but my heart was just so broken I knew it was real. Today has been a little better for me, and I think it is because I had all day yesterday to cry it out. B is having a very difficult day today agian. Yesterday he couldn't talk on the phone to me without crying and today he is having a very stressful day at work and started crying the second he got on the phone with me during his lunch break. I don't think B realized how much he wanted another baby until all this happened.

Please be praying for us during this difficult time. We know that it is just another bump in the road and God will see us through it. We trust that He will never put on us more than we can handle!!!